Parade Busters
by Amanda Reckonwith

Mission participants at staging area prior to mission.

Be on the lookout for the known and nefarious suspect, John Wente. On April 29th (2000), the aforesaid Wente led an insurgent group of other ne'er-do-wells on a midday mission to infiltrate the Founders' Day Parade in Chickasha. For reasons of security, the true intent of this ride mission was undisclosed even to the participants until the actual "surgical insertion" of the bandit group into the parade. In order to confuse any outside attempts to foil the mission, departure was made about 20 minutes later than the posted time, under cover of foul weather. The group approached from an alternate assembly area, an unnamed ice cream shop in Union City, gliding stealthily through the unsuspecting communities of Minco and Pocasset, where surreptitious fuel stops were made. Final approach was directed by Wente, using a direct headwind as a distraction. As the insurgents entered Chickasha from the west, they saw the lights of several police units in the distance. Only then was the true goal of the mission disclosed... busting up the Founders' Day parade by actually entering into and riding in the parade as unregistered bandit paraders. Prior to the group's arrival, the parade consisted of 2 or 3 antique cars, a contingent of 3-foot tall karate students, 2 entries from the local "tractor club", 2 horses with riders, 1 miniature [biting] horse, and a barking dog. When our group was finally detected by locals, our formidability was instantly recognized and total acquiescence gave over. The barking dog entry was withdrawn immediately, and we were invited to join in the parade. Having gained the upper hand effortlessly and having snatched victory from the jaws of tedium, we rolled like a tide down the parade route. As we passed the review stand/flatbed trailer, someone finally divulged our identity and the roar of adulation beggared all description. At parade's end, mission-leader Wente held a debriefing session in the Kiwanis room of the Chickasha Hotel, where anonymity was maintained until the coast was clear.

Upon completion of the debriefing and a large cheeseburger and fries consumed by Andy, all that remained was a safe journey back to the original staging area in Union city. Leaving nothing to chance, the ubiquitous Wente ordered a withdrawal under cover of even fouler weather than before, this being critical to the overall security of the mission. The return was quiet, orderly, and again stealthy, stopping again only for essential fuel. Upon returning to the staging area, total victory was celebrated with a round of malts and shakes and miscellaneous dip-cones.

I say again, be on the alert for one John Wente. He is known for rabble-rousing and for conspiracy to instigate a general good time. Other suspects in this unlikely "baker’s dozen" include but are not limited to… Jim & Arletta, Moni, Andy, Dannie, Joe, Tom, Ron, Esther, Jim & Laurie, and Amanda Reckonwith. Some if not all of these names are known to be assumed and should not be used for serious purposes.

All right, you've been warned!

 

 

 

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Oklahoma Bicycle Society: Parade Busters
created by John Wente
last modified: February 18, 2007
URL: http://www.OklahomaBicycleSociety.com